Are women better leaders than men?

I am not one to believe men make better leaders than women or vice-versa. It must begin with who you are what’s your character I am experiencing and do you know what you’re talking about. But women hold themselves back with self-limiting beliefs that translate into fears. These fears keep them from taking on significant leadership role. Call it The Good Girl Trap or Imposter trap.

For example, taking risk is still seen as “scary” by many women. Women don’t like to fail. Men, however, embrace risk as a challenge to overcome and treat failure as a temporary setback.

Women hear “no” to mean forever; men hear “no” to mean a temporary delay. How can women feel motivated to try new things when they are fearful of hearing “no”?

Women limit their opportunities to be heard because they fear being judged as too aggressive, pushy, or disagreeable. They stand on ceremony and often avoid speaking out to avoid criticism. Meanwhile, male colleagues naturally take the risk, present the same idea, and are applauded for their insights.

Women are still concerned about what others think, and they fear criticism. They have a strong desire to be liked by others. It’s part of the way we’ve been socialized. We often get caught up in the “Good Girl Trap,” believing that being liked is a priority. This translates into the belief that unparalleled commitment and achieving results are enough to move up the ranks. Men have cleverly figured out that they don’t have to do all the work as long as it gets done.

Women seek external validation to a fault. Consequently women look for confirmation of their self-worth to others and often wait to get promoted instead of asking for it upfront. They often sabotage future opportunities by questioning whether they are fully qualified enough to take on greater responsibilities, often missing the opportunity of a lifetime.

Women are averse to playing in the political arena, as it feels unnatural and fake. Therefore, aside from resisting the networking activities, they avoid discussing their accomplishments with senior management when opportunity arises. The idea of “tooting their own horn” brings on stress and discomfort. However, they must make sure that management is aware of their accomplishments rather than hoping that hard work will speak for itself.

REGARDLESS OF MALE OR FEMALES LEADERSHIP

1.  Speak up. Make it a habit to give your opinion at least once during every meeting. If you fear that you will be seen as too aggressive or opinionated, speak up but invite others to voice their thoughts as well. This illustrates that you are collaborative and value others’ opinions.

2. Speak up and ask for what you want. Develop the courage and tenacity to do so.

3. Attack overwhelming problems systematically. BE STRATEGIC.

Identify what the obstacles are and then tackle them down step by step.

4. Don’t get stuck in the negative. Move from why it isn’t happening to how it could happen.  USE “OPPORTUNITY” NEVER ‘PROBLEM’

5. Don’t go it alone. Surround yourself with a good team to make change happen. Build relationships so you can secure champions and sponsors within your organization.

6. Be a general. Have a good understanding of corporate politics, power structures, and alliances. Pick your battles wisely.

7. Build your “net worth.” Look at networking as your “net worth” and book time in your calendar to follow up all leads–even superficial ones. This is how men boost their visibility and make business connections.

8. Have courage.  Venture out of your comfort zone. Confidence comes from celebrating lessons learned, rather than focusing on what didn’t work.  And confidence creates the foundation needed for taking on leadership roles. Embrace your fear—and use it as a motivator.

What do you think . . . take my poll and let me know . . .

 

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7 responses to “Are women better leaders than men?”

  1. Mark Lange says :

    Great piece, Roz! Okay, I’m a guy, and there are days when I couldn’t agree more: What if Women Ran the World? http://bit.ly/GGmmiA

    • rozcoach says :

      Great question. I don’t want to take sides. Equality could only make it a better place for women today and for our daughters of the future. Thanks for the thought provoking response.

    • rozcoach says :

      I appreciate your comments and thanks for reading my blog.
      Roz

  2. Andre says :

    I’ve had the great opportunity to have worked with both. Some good and not so good.. If there had been an even split for both sexes we could have a fantastic debate but it is still too lopsided in the ranks of men to women.Enjoyed the 8 pieces of advice. See you on our next marathon(debate)

  3. canadassalescoach says :

    In almost 25 years of working with leaders of major corporations, we cleanly don’t have enough women leaders.

    They are there…but it feels many are on hold. With just a bit of support and encouragement, I have seen what they can do.

    If I were forced to identify one cause, it seems they are not active enough at putting together gender-based support groups.

    Powerful stuff here, Roz…as usual.

    Tom Stoyan
    Canada’s Sales Coach

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